1.3.2005

i know..

it's always some kind of drama!!! it's crazy. by the way, i don't think i included in my rambling that he is in fact NOT my cousin (we are cheesy movie.. we are NOT jerry springer).

in answer to your questions.. i don't want to have something long distance. especially b/c there hasn't been any relationship now.. i want us to be however we'd normally be.. which i'm guessing is emails and maybe a call or two. but i don't want to tell him on the phone when he's in india and i DON"T want to wait a year... so i'm figuring that at least i'll get it out in the open... and then probably nothing happens for a year but at least he knows what i'm thinking...

as far as the other questions...
i don't know what he's ready for.. b/c i don't think i really want anything to happen. i just want him to know that i like him.. i figured either way he's leaving.. either he's not interested and just a big flirt ;) or he is and he's leaving.. so i'm safe in telling him and then i deal with whatever happens when he's back.

he is normally not-aggressive. i was talking to steve his rommate about this and he was like "you guys are gonna get together but he's too shy to make a move, so you have to". where do i FIND these guys? i don't really know other details..

i know he hasn't dated in forever. he hasn't while i've been living here.. but steve said he doesn't know of anyone that he dated in college either. i never bring it up with him... so i have no idea why. seems odd?

so yeah.. i'm not really sure what i'm trying to accomplish but this limbo stage has gotten really frustrating and i want it to go one direction or the other. so lunch it is...

going away party is now on thursday. :)