urgh

the radiator in my apt is broken...so no heat...:(
dev called yesterday twice, so i finally called him back and told him that i hadnt been calling him cause i really want this break and i want time to myself and i probably want this to be permanent but we can talk about that in januray when i get back from dc....

he said ok (this was at 10) then he called twice at 3 am...i felt bad and answered - bad idea - we "tried explaining our views" until about 430 at which point i tried explaining to him that was the whole problem - we both want different things and im tired of feeling like i have to change a lot to make him happy and im tired of asking him to change to make me happy. i jsut want to be by myself...he didnt take it so well, kept discussing insisting we could reach an agreement, i finally said i have to go and just hung up at like 445...

i called this morning to say that im sorry i hung up but i needed to end the conversation and i cant handle that anymore, hence the desire to break up. he kept reminding me of wonderful things we had - i kept reminding him that those wonderful things happened a long time ago and its not so wonderful anymore...anyway i leave at like 1 am today so ill def have my break/time to myself soon enough....

thought i should update you whether you want it or not :)

fyi - i saw cheaper by the dozen yesterday cause peter told me he thought it was funny and "really good" yeah well 10 min into i realized why he thought that - HILLARY DUFF. :) i was amused